


Bonding over Whiskey

by female_overlord_3



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec and Clary care about each other, Alec and Clary talk, Crack Fic, Drunk Alec, Drunk Clary, F/M, Jace loves them, M/M, Magnus loves them, i guess OOC, love you Nyx, one big happy loving family, sappy Alec, sharing memories, they bond over Jace and Magnus, they the best bro's
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 08:22:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13050186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/female_overlord_3/pseuds/female_overlord_3
Summary: The amazing Angelwithwingsoffire wanted an Alec and Clary bonding fic cause these two having to deal with Jace's impulsive ass. I love them all.This is also inspired by the seriesDrinksbyDarkangel86who has some awesome fics go check them out!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Angelwithwingsoffire](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelwithwingsoffire/gifts), [darkangel86](https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkangel86/gifts).



> No idea if this was what you wanted darling but it was fun to write and I hope you enjoy it!

Today has been peacefully tame, Alec only needing to sign forms and read over this week’s reports which he would usually glare at in annoyance but since there aren’t too many and today’s been so nice, the process is almost soothing. 

He’s going over the last one and just about to sign off on it, maybe see if Magnus wants to have lunch here or if they could go somewhere, when the door to his office burst open and a quick glance up reveals red hair informing him who the interruption is. Said interruption starts yelling about something, Alec catches  _ Jace _ and  _ Parabatai _ and that she wants to  _ murder him _ so he knows what this conversation is going to lead to.

As Clary continues to rant and wave her arms around in frustration, Alec calmly and silently signs the last form before placing it to the side and finally looks up again to sigh out, “What’s he done now?”

Clary spins to glare at Alec. “He’s being a self sacrificing bastard who doesn’t understand that he’s doing more harm than good when he decides to jump in front of a sword for me in the middle of a battle!” Alec nods along and sighs again “Yeah he does that and?” 

This seems to make Clary angrier. “And you accept this?! That he does that? Continuously!”  

Alec just shrugs in answer but the hard look he’s receiving suggests he say more.

“Clary what am I supposed to do? Yes he’s my parabatai, I know his pain when someone he cares about gets hurt and he mine. I can’t tell him not to act or try and assuage that pain.”

Clary opens her mouth to shout an accusation but takes a second to think and then shuts it before sighing and dropping into a chair. Alec gives her a couple more seconds to figure out what she needs to say before adding in something that might help her. 

“We both know we’d do the same thing for him right? So try to understand that too, how he feels when we try to protect him.”

A small frown appears on Clary’s face as she stares down at her hands. “I know he does it because he loves us but you’re right, we do it because we love him too and we don’t want him getting hurt… because of us right?” They share a rare understanding look before Alec gives her a small joking smile. “You don’t know the half of it Fray, try dealing with him the last ten years.”

Clary snorts at that and leans back in her chair. “Oh god I can’t even think about that.”

A hesitant look from from Clary gives Alec pause and he gives her questioning on. “Uuumm could you tell me?” “About?” Alec knows what she’s asking but he can still make this fun for himself. “Jace, Lightwood. What was he like growing up?” She gets an uninterested humm in answer. Clary glares at him before an idea comes to her. “If you tell me about Jace and you all being young baby Lightwoods, I’ll tell you the memories I have about Magnus. Fair trade?” There’s a glint of hope in her eyes and Alec swears Izzy taught her that sad face thing… “I don’t know Fray.” He humors until his eyes widen when Clary brings a bottle of whiskey from out of thin air.

“Clary what the- never mind.” Eyeing the brand Alec is annoyed that it’s the one he actually likes. Shaking the bottle in front of him Clary knows she won.

“Fine.” He huffs as he swipes the bottle from her and produces shot glasses from his desk. Clary makes an excited noise which he ignores and pours them each a shot then motions for her to go first. Shrugging Clary throws it back and scrunches her nose at the string. “So ok lets see. A memory I do have that’s pretty clear is helping Magnus take care of the cats, he made bowls of food appear and some toys. He’d let me play with them after the memory removal, it helped calm me down.” 

The imagery brings a soft smile to Alec’s face when he compares that to the few times he’d been home and Magnus was playing with the cats or a stray dog that pops up here and there. Lost in thought, Alec blinks at Clary when she nudges him. “Oh right.” He pours her another shot then drinks his. With a pleasant warmth starting to settle through him, it takes little consideration to tell this one hilarious memory that he and Izzy still give Jace crap for when the chance comes up.

"When I was 12 and he was 10, still pretty recent from when he came to live with us, thinking he was invincible he tried to climb to the top of the institute from the outside. Let's just say he got halfway before realizing there was no possible way for him to get to the top without the elevator and panicked before I could get him down. For some god awful reason he decided to jump and thought the bushes would soften the fall, thank the angel he made it. He was like a handful of inches from hitting the concrete and breaking something. Whenever Izzy and I can, we bring it up. You'd be surprised how often it has."

A look of realization dawns Clary's face. "Wait so it that what the bushes thing means? Omg it finally makes sense!" Alec nods."Yup. Okay you're turn." 

"I think there was one time when I was really young and I saw Magnus Warlock marks for the first time and called him "kitty". I was probably 7 or 8 and his hair was all spiked and looked like cat ears." She chuckles at the memory. "Ok now how about a nice memory?"  

The first one that comes to Alec's mind makes him smile. “Ok well when he was 13 and I was 15 we snuck out, Jace wanting to of course and I just went to make sure he didn’t die, to go see some event he saw on a patrol. It was a street event somewhere near central park with food trucks, stalls selling things and some art. It was really nice, safe. I think it was maybe one of the safest things we ever did when we were young.” A gentle thrum of nostalgia washes over Alec as he recalls the event. “At first Jace was the one dragging me around the place, going to different food trucks, checking out all the things there until it started getting late and I wanted to go to this one last thing, a little stall selling books. Somehow he had enough money to buy it for me. I think I still have it somewhere at home.”

Clary giggles at him before taking the shot he pours her. “God you’re a sap. Hmmm ok my turn. Well the last memory I have is from the last memory wipe which was of him and my mom arguing. He wanted to stop, my mom didn’t. I think I was maybe 15 or younger but I remember starting to freak out cause I had no idea what was going on. He saw that and made a whole cake appear in his hands. I was allowed to have as much as I wanted, it was my favorite too Red Velvet with buttercream frosting.” 

Alec groans as he starts imagining having cake right now. “Great Fray now I want cake.” He takes another shot of whiskey then laughs. “Oh I have another one.”

It goes on like that, each sharing a memory they have until Clary says she doesn’t have anymore, the topic changing to other things like childhood shenanigans, and previous crushes.

They’re already halfway through the bottle when Clary says “Ya know Alec I never hated you.” She’s staring at her shot glass deep in thought. “No you were just an asshole but I didn’t get it then with things being all-” She waves her around trying to emphasize her point. 

“I did.” 

She slaps his arm for the reply. Alec slaps her back. 

“Well just for a little bit. You’re annoying.” 

“You’re still an asshole.” 

“I’m your boss.” 

“My boss who’s an asshole.”

“2 weeks of weapon cleaning!” 

“Noooo i’m sorry but I’m just telling the truth.” 

“Tough luck Fray that’s what you get.” 

“No wait you’re not a complete asshole-” 

“Thank you.” 

“-Magnus made you less of an asshole.”

“Hey Magnus is not an asshole!” 

“No I didn’t say-” 

“3 months weapon cleaning and 1 week training the newbies.” 

“Alec.” 

“No you insulted my Magnus. He’s amazing and beautiful and so hot Clary how did I get a boyfriend who’s so hot? Like his face is so pretty and he’s so strong, his arms, I would let him crush me with his arms. Oh and he’s so smart, he’s a genius and I love him so much I think- hey what are you doing.” He squints at Clary’s phone. “Shhh keep going. How pretty is Magnus?”

“He’s so pretty like an angel, he’s my angel. I wanna marry him and have a family and kiss him. His lips are so soft and nice. I love his hair though, and his make-up. His skin is so soft and his cat eyes make me go crazy. I don’t think he liked them that much but that’s okay, I can love them for the both of us. When he does magic it’s amazing. Ha take that world i’m happy and in love with a hot genius amazing warlock. He loves me by the angel why does he love me?” 

“Can I have him?” 

“I will murder you if you ever say that again. Magnus is mine and I love him so much. If you or anyone tries to take him from me I will raise heaven and hell, shoot them in the head, and destroy them.” 

“But he has a boyfriend… wait Alec are you- No wait you’re his boyfriend! Stop crying! I didn’t learn this in boating school!” 

“What the hell is boating school!”

Clary drops her phone to carefully pat Alec’s head.

They keep drinking until the bottles empty and somehow end up both complaining again about Jace being stupid and why they love him. That’s how Jace finds them, sitting next to each other on the floor with their backs against Alec’s desk as they glare at him.

“Ok what did I do this time?” 

“You’re stupid.” Clary looks to Alec who nods. “And we need to put a leash on you.” They both laugh at that. “Also we hate you.” Alec adds and goes back to glaring at Jace, “cause you keep almost dying.” Clary nods rapidly, almost falling forward but Alec keeps her steady. “We’re smart and we know what to do now.” 

“Ya next time we think you’re gonna do something stupid we’re gonna play a sound.” Alec fumbles with getting his phone out then lets out a small giggle out when he sees the screensaver. He flaps his hand at Clary when she starts cooing because it's a picture of Magnus and him. Getting back on task he looks for the video they found earlier. 

A loud quack blares from the phone and Jace looks down at them with panic. “You didn’t.” He receives twin grins as Clary drunkenly searches for her phone to do the same. 

“ _ Okay _ i’m gonna call Magnus to come get you then take Clary back to our room once he has. Jesus did you guys- yup the bottles empty. You guys are gonna hate yourselves in the morning.” He chuckles as he makes the call to Magnus.

“Magnus will save me. He’s magic and incredible. He has a potion.” A smile spreads across Alec’s face. Jace thinks he looks like a lovesick idiot. “Ya you might want to pick Alec up, he and Clary are pretty drunk… in his office… cool bye.”

Not a second later a portal appears and Magnus comes strutting out. He sees his very drunk boyfriend with his mouth open staring at him. “Had a bit to drink Alexander.”

“I love you.” Alec blurts out.

Magnus snorts and walks over. “As I love you.”

Alec turns to Clary who’s dozing off. “See he loves me and he’s mine. You keep Jace, he’s your annoying other half.” Clary grumbles at him but musters just enough energy to look Magnus dead in the eye and say, “Hurt him and I burn you. With fire. Lots and lots of fire.” before falling asleep on Alec’s shoulder. Alec nods in agreement then looks at Jace. “Hurt her and I ask Magnus to turn you into a duck.” He gently lays Clary down then stumbles into Magnus. “So pretty. Love you. Smell so nice. Magnus so soft.” He nuzzles into Magnus neck sounding very content as he falls asleep. “Well i’ll be taking him home now. Thank you for calling me and i’ll have a hangover remedy for Biscuit on her bedside table. Have a good night Jace.”   

Jace gives a little wave then carefully picks Clary up as well as her phone and heads back to their room. Maybe he should try and be more careful on patrols or those two will find something else to use against him. Ugh he hopes Alec didn’t tell them about the incident they  _ do not speak of _ when he was 10. He wonders why he loves these two crazy people. A hand slaps him and he stares down at Clary who’s still dead to the world but frowning. “Love you too Clary.” Her frowning face turns into a smiling one. As he said: crazy.

Once he’s changed Clary into some comfy pajamas and checked that Magnus did indeed leave that remedy, he goes to put Clary’s phone away when he sees it’s still recording. Stopping it and playing it from the beginning he laughs when he realizes he has some blackmail he can hangover Alec’s head. He sends it to Alec and grins. Man he loves these two.


	2. Blackmail is fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus sees the video.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Malecislife wanted Magnus reaction to the video and seeing as I wanted to added it in I did!

Magnus portalled them right into their bedroom, not wanting to try and drag Alec all the way from the living room. He magic’s Alec’s clothes away and switches them to just boxer briefs before settling the covers over him. Alec gets increasingly more cuddly when he’s drunk, the last time he complained that there were too many clothes. Doing the same for himself, Magnus is all ready to get in bed with his cuddly Alexander, when Alec’s phone makes a noise. Curious as to who would be messaging so late in the night Magnus sees it’s from Jace. All it says is “No more ducks.” with a video attached to it.

Magnus is just about to press play when a hand bumps into his back then paws at him. Leaving the video for later, he easily slides under the covers and lets his monkey of a boyfriend latch onto him. Alec’s soft snores lull Magnus to sleep.

                                                                                                                          *-*-*-*

When Alec wakes up everything's a bit fuzzy. His head hurts and his mouth tastes horrible. 

“Morning sunshine, here drink this.” Looking blurrily up at Magnus, he takes what’s handed to him and downs it. Magnus snickers at the face he makes but Alec can already feel the hangover remedy working. 

“How much did Clary and I drink?” He groans as he hesitantly sits up.

Magnus just humms at him as he messages the back of Alec’s neck. “Well the bottle was empty when I got there and you both fell asleep.” A chuckle escapes Magnus as he presses a kiss to Alec’s forehead. “You also threatened Jace if her hurts Clary after she did the same to me.”

He gives Alec an amused look. “Had some bonding time I see.”

Alec just shrugs as he rests his face under Magnus neck. “Sure.” He mumbles. “Jace was being self-sacrificing again and who else for Clary to vent to then someone who’s been dealing with it for years?” 

“I’m proud of you, I remember how  _ intense _ you both were at the start. Clary just wanted to get her mom. You just wanted her to leave. I’m just glad she did stumble into our lives.” He lifts Alec’s head up to stare lovingly at him. “I don’t know how long it would have been if we met then. I’m glad she brought me you.” It’s the easiest thing for Alec to lean in and press a gentle kiss to Magnus lips. “I would love to do more but my mouth tastes worse with that remedy and I need to use the bathroom.” He gives Magnus one last peck before stumbling to the bathroom.

Admiring watching Alec leave, Magnus gets up to start breakfast when Alec’s phone chimes. It reminds him about the video and after seeing the sweet text Clary sent, he goes and plays it.

It’s clearly Clary filming and it’s quite shaky meaning the two have had most of the Whiskey by now. Alec looks pleasantly drunk and has a dreamy look in his eyes as he talks.

“-face is so pretty and he’s so strong, his arms, I would let him crush me with his arms. Oh and he’s so smart, he’s a genius and I love him so much I think- hey what are you doing.” 

Alec squints at the phone recording him until Clary says, “Shhh keep going. How pretty is Magnus?”

That dreamy look reappears as he continues talking. “He’s so pretty like an angel, he’s my angel. I wanna marry him and have a family and kiss him. His lips are so soft and nice. I love his hair though, and his make-up. His skin is so soft and his cat eyes make me go crazy. I don’t think he liked them that much but that’s okay, I can love them for the both of us. When he does magic it’s amazing. Ha take that world i’m happy and in love with a hot genius amazing warlock. He loves me by the angel why does he love me?” 

“Can I have him?” Clary’s voice asks all giggly.

Magnus burst out laughing when Alec’s expression turns dark and steely. “I will murder you if you ever say that again. Magnus is mine and I love him so much. If you or anyone tries to take him from me I will raise heaven and hell, shoot them in the head, and destroy them.” 

“But he has a boyfriend… wait Alec are you- No wait you’re his boyfriend! Stop crying! I didn’t learn this in boating school!” 

“What the hell is boating school!”

The phone falls to the floor but continues recording what the two are talking about. Magnus is left fallen over on their bed as he laughs so hard his stomach hurts. He’s wheezing when Alec returns, literal tears shining in his eyes. Alec looks at him in concern until he hears his then Clary’s voice coming from his phone. “Oh god she was recording.”

Magnus gets up and hugs Alec tightly around the waist as he presses light kisses all over the others face. “I thought it was incredibly sweet.” He says between fits of giggles. “Also very informative.”

Alec’s cheek’s are a light pink but he can’t really be too embarrassed because what he said was true. “I’m glad you were informed.”

“Jace is going to use it as blackmail. Tough luck for him.” Magnus lightly brushes their noses together. “Now about my arms.” He smirks when Alec bites his lip. “.... it’s not my fault they’re amazing.” Alec whines when Magnus squeezes him a little tighter. “Oh and my lips?” He purrs as they start kissing and tumble onto the bed. There’s no reply to that but neither of them mind.

                                                                                                                        *-*-*-*

It’s later in the morning when Alec returns to the Institute with Magnus tagging along. Clary all but barrels into Magnus as she thanks him for the hangover remedy. 

“Magnus if you need anything I will do it.” Clary declares as she also goes to hug Alec. He keeps a straight face but Magnus can see the warmth in his eyes.

“Morning brother, sparkles.” Jace calls out as he walks down the hall. Clary and Alec share a look. “2 months newbie training.” Alec smirks at the shocked face Jace makes. “I- what?”

“You insulted Magnus.” Clary adds. Alec nods in agreement. “No one insults Magnus.”

Jace gives them a conflicted look of whether to take them serious or not. 

Clary just keeps smiling and greets him with a kiss to his cheek. “So have you seen any nice bushes lately?” She asks and look of horror makes both her and Alec laugh. 

“You promised!” Jace glares at Alec but the smile gives him away. “Well I guess I can tell Magnus about the summer of-” A loud quack silences Jace as he whips around to find where it came from. Clary waves her phone at him before putting it away. “Jace you can share that when it’s just you and Magnus, not out in the open.” Lightly patting his cheek she takes his hand so they can see when they need to go on patrol.

“I hate you all.” He grumbles. “We love you too.” Alec and Clary say in sync.

**Author's Note:**

> Oh I wonder what happened that summer?


End file.
